2018 Skyway Epic

Lets see

Jerkoff race promoter started the race 4 minutes early, after giving a 5 minute warning and starting to make small talk. I think as soon as he saw me ride off to the porta-potty he said something like it was go-time as soon as I opened the door. Because that was what happened. It was embarrassing and made me feel like a fool. Seriously fuck that guy, what an asshole.

Rode angry all race and knocked 30 minutes off my time from last year. Probably riding a mountain bike with hydraulic brakes and the cooler weather helped.

Unbeknownst to me my bottom bracket was pretty much destroyed within the first few miles. The incessant squishy creaking that followed me all race was due to the bearings on the drive side being completely seized. When I noticed later I could not turn the crank by hand without bracing my entire body and putting in some serious strength. Realized I wasted a ton of energy pushing it around the course.

Skipped the trash food they serve at the end and just went home. I’m not doing any more events from this guy.

 

 

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Race Report: Middle Ga Epic 2018

I won, also came in 3rd. Mainly because all the hardasses did the 200k.

Course was pretty well split between gravel, sandy/silty muddy dirt and pavement. Several people crashed in the first muddy rutted section, everyone sat on for the first 55 miles. I attacked with one guy and then two guys and got some distance, lost a few places once we hit the soft downhill but got a few back after one rider got stuck in some mud and the other pulled the ripcord on the rocky hill a few miles out. Managed to keep him in the distance and finish first in my class and third overall.

Nice event, had a lot of fun. Everything worked out pretty great, cut off shorts are fun.Shorts.jpg

Link to facebook pictures of the course

 

Event Listing

3/31/2012 – Alleycat – Sopo Broken Hearts and Bicycle Parts
7/28/2012 – Hellcat Alleycat 9th?
8/24/2012 – NHLB Peachtree Bash 1st
9/21/2012 – NHLB Moving too Quickly – 2nd?
11/17/2012 – NHLB Black Cat Alleycat – 1st but not really

4/6/2013 – NHLB A Fucking Bike Race – 1st
5/18/2013 – Gainesville Gran Prix | CCR 8/26
5/18/2013 – Gainesville Gran Prix | ITT 1/15
5/19/2013 – Gainesville Gran Prix | RR 5/32
5/26/2013 – Southeast Regional Series: Event #1 Begin, Believe 13/27
5/28/2013 – AMP Cycling Series | CRITERIUM 5/8
6/11/2013 – AMP Cycling Series | CRIT 4/9
6/15/2013 – Georgia State Championship road Race | RR | Open 9/22
6/18/2013 – AMP Cycling Series | CRIT 1/7
6/23/2013 – Southeast Regional Series: Event #2 Montgomery | RR 6/22
6/25/2013 – AMP Cycling Series | CRIT 4/6
7/6/2013 – Georgia Games | ROAD RACE 24/32
7/7/2013 – Georgia Games | CRITERIUM 26/34
7/13/2013 – Dingo Days of Summer Criterium Weekend – Flowery Br 9/13
7/14/2013 – Dingo Days of Summer Criterium Weekend – Flowery Br 8/17
7/16/2013 – AMP Cycling Series | CRIT 5/7
7/20/2013 – French Broad Cycling Classic-2013 | RR 23/62
8/17/2013 – Litespeed BMW Twilight Criterium | CRITERIUM 29/31
8/24/2013 – Village Volkswagen River Gorge | RR 19/45
9/8/2013 – AL State RR Championship | Road Race 3/9
9/15/2013 – Southeast Regional Series: Event #5 Greenville | RR 31/41
9/17/2013 – AMP Cycling Series | CRIT 7/13
10/25/2013 – NHLB x Cogzilla Attacks Black Cat Strikes Back Alleycat – DNF

3/30/2014 – 3rd Annual Gainesville Gran Prix | RR 18/46
4/6/2014 – Foothills Road Race | RR 16/27
4/19/2014 – Chainbuster 3 hours of Payne 5/10
6/28/2014 – Wrenched Bicycles 3rd Annual Dingo Days of Summer | 17/22
7/12/2014 – Outback Omnium at Dick Lane Velodrome – 2nd
7/13/2014 – Georgia Games MTB Race
7/26/2014 – Chainbuster 3 Hours of Tacos
8/3/2014 – Georgia Cup- Duluth Twilight and Road Race Gwinnett DNF
9/13/2014 – Chainbuster 3 Hours of Camp Thunder 1st
10/25/2014 – Samurai Hill Alleycat – 2nd

2/28/2015 – Chainbuster Assault Mt. Currahee 13/30
3/14/2015 – Southern Cross 21/44 & 51/157
4/18/2015 – Shake ‘n’ Brake 100k 1/1
8/22/2015 – Red Clay Ramble 4/15
10/10/2015 – Samurai Hill Alleycat 2nd to last?
10/31/2015 – Sac o’ Suds 9th?

2/27/2016 – Chainbuster Assault Mt. Currahee 13/35
3/5/2016 – Southern Cross 24/29 & 75/229
3/12/2016 – Chainbuster Green Gobbler 3 Hour 4/12
4/16/2016 – Blankets Creek Dirty 30 10/15
4/23/2016 – Shake ‘n’ Brake 9/13
4/30/2016 – Raider 48
5/14/2016 – Dirty Spokes 3 hours of Ft Yargo 4/5
8/20/2016 – Red  Clay Ramble 14/18
11/5/2016 – Sac o’ Suds
1/6/2016 – Standard Deluxe Dirt Road Century | Metric Century 2/25

2/27/2017 – Chainbuster Assault on Mt. Currahee 28/39 & 80/100
3/4/2017 – Southern Cross 33/42 & 111/322
3/11/2017 – Chainbuster 3 hours of Ft. Payne 2/12
4/8/2017 – Skyway Epic 7/11
4/15/2017 – Blankets Creek Dirty 30 8/21
4/22/2017 – Shake ‘n’ Brake 5/7 & 18/52
4/29/2017 – Big Frog 65
5/13/2017 – Dirty Spokes 3 hours of Ft Yargo 4/13
8/19/2017 – Red Clay Ramble 19/31 & 37/100
9/16/2017 – Fools Gold 48 14/16 & 84/252
9/30/2017 – Chainbuster Big Ring Challenge 4/5
10/14/2017 – All-a-toona
10/21/2017 – Standard Deluxe Dirt Road Century | Gran Fondo 7/34
11/4/2017 – Sac o’ Suds 4/45
12/2/2017 – Death March Revival 11/41

2/17/2018 – Middle GA Epic 100k 1/9 & 3/56
2/24/2018 – Fried Green 200k 7:43
3/3/2018 – Southern Cross 26/27 & 127/323
3/10/2018 – Old Capital Classic 2nd
3/11/2018 – Beltgrind 2nd
3/31/2018 – Homestead Hollow 300k (13:05)
4/7/2018 – Skyway Epic 60 6th
4/14/2018 – Blankets Creek Dirty 30 4/12
6/2/2018 – Red Clay Ramble 16/25 & 31/80
9/15/2018 – Fools Gold 55 9/11 & 57/191
9/29/2018 – Big Ring 5/6 & 51/110
10/21/2018 – Standard Deluxe Dirt Road Century 12/58

Event Schedule 2017

MTB

Gravel

Road

Randonneuring

Fun Rides

Race Report: Standard Deluxe Dirt Road Century 2017

https://www.strava.com/activities/1240738106

This is the most perfect race I’ve ever done.

I got dropped early but quickly joined a chasing trio. We rotated well and kept the pace high, at the first aid station we all stopped to pee and refill water. About 6-7 riders came in just after us and eventually we all got together and kept the same high pace. Lots of rotation and regrouping – southeast riders can be very polite and hardworking.

As we moved through the dusty countryside the pace pushed higher and higher and riders dropped as exhaustion and mental fatigue set in.

Riding in a fast paceline on unknown gravel roads creates a hyper focus – it’s a rush and completely fills my mind. There is no time to focus on anything other than the road 15-20 meters ahead. I eat, I pedal and I rotate through with strong pulls.

Eventually we hit pavement. The rush recedes and suddenly we’re all just pedaling along – confusion sets in and there is some crowding and back and forth rotations as everyone tries to square their different bikes and tires and strengths. Eventually we all calm down and the rotations begin again.

Thinking back now, 2 weeks removed from the event, this reminds me of having an injury break in the middle of a wrestling match. High school wrestling is an absurd sport and this is no more obvious than when the pause button is hit and I’m just standing there in a tiny lycra singlet while the other guy gets his bleeding nose stopped with tiny cylinders of cotton.

For the previous 3 minutes we’ve been locked in combat. Arms, legs, heads and bodies attacking, defending with hearts pounding away. Suddenly a spot of blood appears on the mat and multiple whistles are blown. The hands of the ref, shockingly strong, pull us apart and my bleeding opponent kneels in place as his injury is attended to. I stand there and can only really hear my heart beating. Everything takes a crystal focus. I feel like I can see every single face in the stands at once. My dad yelling encouragement in the stands as my coach paces back and forth showing support with a diminutive thumbs up and some clapping. My mind is running so fast and I’m only along for the ride, the break only takes a minute or two but it feels like an eternity. Wrestling cleared my mind and now I’m noticing everything that had been turned off. I’m cold and tired and hungry and angry and ready to get back to wrestling. I’ve worn down my opponent and he doesn’t deserve any rest now so close to his edge. Shortly the ref guides us back to the center and we resume, everything gets shut off again and I feel at home.

Anyway, the pavement section is fast and a little boring. We blast along rolling hills and I look around and note the other bikes. I see a 650b Open Up with slick tread WTB Horizon tires, another a Felt that is some sort of monstercross rig with 60mm G-One tires. Mostly the other riders are on cross bikes with mildly aggressive 38mm-44mm tires, like my bike but theirs are either carbon of aluminum. That’s ok, I like my wiggly steel Soma – it’s skinny tubes look nice and it rides so well.

We reel in a few more riders and the group is eating and happy and moving along. Shortly we hit gravel and the knives come back out. The strength differences become apparent after each rider takes a few pulls. The weaker riders are slowly discarded as the pace picks up incrementally. I dig in my dwindling reserves and try my hardest to maintain the pace when I hit the front and there’s an uphill. It’s uncouth to drive the pace from the front on the flats or downhills – just a waste of energy and I’ll get caught anyway.

But when the road turns up, that’s where I can attack. Keep it quiet and non-obvious. A little bit faster here, keep the cadence normal but pedal hard. Riders behind will unconsciously keep up and with each 20-30 second climb they get pushed closer and closer to the edge.

Miles tick by, the gravel goes from grey to white to red to orange back to red and we get closer to the finish. I keep one eye on my GPS and watch the miles go by, the other is on the remaining group members. There are five of use now, they are all strong and the friendliness and comport have left. We’re riding the ragged edge of exhaustion. Mental and physical fatigue are intense and slowly grinding down our will to continue. We are close to the finish, less than 2 kilometers now. Intermingled with the short course riders I surge over the remaining hills. In the drops climbing out of the saddle but crouched low. The gravel rumbles under my tires. Our group is still together but spread out, attacks come and go – no one has enough energy to pull more than a few bike lengths ahead. I am metering out my efforts as well as I can, I have hardly anything left by the time we hit the wooden bridge that signals the last few hundred meters.

The group is still together, a ragged sail of five riders crouched over their machines breathing fire amid the dusty heat of the day. We are seconds from finishing, ending the pain and falling into the grass exhausted. The group is fluid, posturing and threatening attacks when something explodes in my head. I grip the drops as if to crush them and stomp the pedals, attack so none can follow, blasting ahead I leave the group behind. Bouncing and skittering over the broken pavement I am alone at the top of the hill. I drop my head and coast through the finish line. People are hanging out, mingling with smiles and cold beers. Music drifts through the air chasing laughter and the smell of a well run grill. The instant change of atmosphere is surreal and underlines the absurdity of the experience.